Hybrid millionaire socialist, Shia LaBeouf, was arrested for attacking a fellow protester outside of a New York museum, where the self-styled performance artist is staging a demonstration against Donald Trump.
LaBouffe is famous for being a "hybrid," a radical socialist who is also rich to the tune of $25 million. Scientists say LaBeouf is proof positive for recent advances in bio-engineering, which allow experts to splice socialist and rich elitocracy DNA together.
“This is long enough," said a leading bioengineer, "for us to try to understand how the human and pig cells mix together early on without raising ethical concerns about mature chimeric animals. If it can work for Shia, it can work for anything.”
Shia LaBuffe was heard leaving the New York police station shouting "He will not divide us." whether this was a coded reference to his spliced socialist/capitalist DNA is presently unknown.